The Optimist

Written on Friday, 15 June, 2018

Seven samurai are preparing themselves for battle in a small cottage. A curious and bold optimist walks in and says to one of the samurai: “Wow, I am so amazed! I don’t know how you do it! Aren’t you afraid to die in battle?” The samurai replies: “I am already dead.” “Gawd!!” Says the optimist, “Why do you gotta be so NEGATIVE? Think positively: We will win! We will win!” The seven samurai then quietly exit the cottage, leaving behind the chanting optimist.

Later that day, an optimist sits in a small cottage, saying quietly to himself: “I am grateful to have food, and I am grateful to have a family, and I am grateful for the samurai who protect my village.” Four samurai then enter the cottage, and one of them walks toward where the optimist is, his sword in hand, dripping with the blood of his enemy. The samurai stops in front of the optimist, and looks at him, a hint of pain in his stony expression. The optimist, feeling a little awkward at the samurai’s silence, says: “You won the battle, I see. I knew you would.” The samurai, without moving his body, looks around at his three comrades, and back to the optimist. The optimist, again feeling the silence in the air, with a brisk voice, says: “Well, at least you made it back, right? At least there’s that!” As he turns away to hide is grin, the samurai replies: “At least there’s that,” and wipes the blood from his blade.